The Bandit Poll, Week 3

Another week, another Bandit Poll, preferred by 4 out of 5 dentist.  Before we start let me drop a little Haiku for the Oklahoma State fan who said I was an idiot for not ranking his team.  

Okie State Blew It

You Look Like A Big Clown

No Be A Clown.

1. Alabama - Alabama fans chill, don't be ridiculous about a shutout, unless you just want to look like Yankee fans.

2. Oregon - still quaking.

3. WVU - still mountianing?

4. USC - Matt Barkley is a boy dog.

5. LSU - because I got high.

Twitter Wisdom

Today's twitter wisdom comes from Tennessee's Derek Dooley.  Yes, I have a twitter.  Yes, I have 30k followers.  No, I don't tweet.  Yes, I am boss as all get out.

Follow me on twitter, give in to peer pressure.

SEC Billboard Wars Proliferation

Mississippi State and Ole Miss are locked in a duel to the death.  No it's not the annual Egg Bowl, that is anything but a duel.  It's a game of one-upmanship involving who can out do who with billboards.  MSU launched the first salvo, and now Ole Miss has followed suit.  Little did they know they were going to ignite a SEC billboard arms race.  Now all the SEC schools are involved, lets take a look at their efforts: (click to make images bigger)

Auburn is launching a campaign to stress the life of success a career at Auburn can lead too.

Puppies Respond to the Worst Tweets of the Week

Sometimes only a puppy picture will do. Click the photos to make them larger!

Dennis Dodd of CBS is well known for his inability to understand which team will win in football games.  He wrote an article today detailing what would happen if there were a playoff system in college football.  In this tweet he is going back in time and predicting who would have won each BCS championship had there been a playoff.

His basis for why the SEC, specifically Alabama, would get upset in a playoff is that you can never tell what will happen.  So his argument for making predictions is that you can never know what would happen? Yeah.

He also believes apparently that Nick Saban the best coach currently coaching in college football.  (don't even try to argue he's not) would not have won any championships if it was a playoff system.  Right.

If only we had a playoff, USC and Miami would win every year, unicorns would be real, and there would be world peace.

College Football On Notice Board , Week 6

Weekend 6 is upon us as we head into the middle of the college football season.  I can hardly believe that we have already flown through almost half of our season.  If you had your choice: slow down how fast your kids grow up or how fast football season passes? Which would you choose, be honest now, Jesus is watching. Let's look at the board:

1. The State of Florida - The Florida Gators head to Baton Rouge to face the mighty defense and luck of the LSU Tigers.  Florida is without their senior quarterback John Brantley, who is recovering from having his ankle Alabamaed to death.  After the loss, the Florida fan base quickly revealed themselves to be the whiniest bunch of babies this side of the Mississippi.  A second week of devastating loss and the state of Florida may sink into the ocean from the extra weight of all the B.S. being dropped by Florida fans.  If Florida wins it is because they are good, if another team wins it is because they cheat and are on steroids.

2. Garcia's AA Sponsor - Supposedly Stephen Garcia stopped drinking because Steve Spurrier gave him another chance.  What will happen to him now that he has been benched?   Careful that isn't Gatoraid in that water bottle.

3. Tyler Wilson's Arm - Tyler Wilson threw for over 1500 yards so far this year.  How many yards do you think he can throw for against the fairylike fearsome Auburn pass defense?  I bet he can at least double his total.

4. People Who See "Real Steel" - If you saw this trailer and thought "yeah, I wanna see that" you deserve to have 10 bucks stolen from you.

5. Clemson - Clemson you have been doing so well, you are the kings of the ACC! (for what that is worth)  But you are playing a 1-4 Boston College team this weekend, and this is exactly the kind of game that you love to loose.  It wouldn't be Clemson if they didn't pull a Clemson.

6. The Raped East - The ACC has taken a few teams and now your new bell cow TCU has jumped ship.  It looks like dark times for the never really all that mighty Big East.  Isn't this exactly the kind of stuff Baylor was gonna sue the SEC over?  It's just an ide, that would serve Baylor right.

7. Teams Named After Musicals - It's time for the Red River Rivalry between Texas and Oklahoma.  Everyone and their brother can't stop slobbering over the team named after a fabulous Broadway musical.  Don't rule out Texas though, they are angry at being the butt of everyone's joke all year for the totally ridiculous and not actually seen by viewers Longhorn Network.  They also have a chip on their shoulder as Texas has been relatively ignored by the press and the public compared to other years.  As for Oklahoma I hardly believe beating 3-2 FSU has prepared them for Texas.  Careful boys you are in upset country.

8. Bi-polar Georgia Fans - Just to be clear ALL Georgia fans are bi-polar.  We lost to Boise, boo we are horrible.  We beat Ole Miss, YEA we are awesome! Aww we lost to Tennessee is coming soon.


Want to put me on notice? Do it on the Tweetbook.


  Tweet

Clay Travis Sports Gossip Queen

Clay Travis

There has been a lot of twitter chatter the last week or so over Clay Travis' new website "Outkicking the Coverage." If you don't know Clay Travis he is a Tennessee sports guy who does a radio show on sports in the south, mainly Tennessee related.  He also wrote a couple books about Tennessee football. I can't call Clay a reporter because he doesn't actually report any news; you can't call him just a smart-ass like me because not all his stuff is funny. He is a new breed of  blogger/reporter/smart-ass/homer that has been created by the interwebs.

As you all know I am very positive on bloggers, seeing as though I am one and all. I think it's great that anyone can now express their opinions and ideas and have them read by the masses.  If people like what you have to say it will catch on and you will be a hit, if they don't then it will fizzle. Blogging has made reporting on sports a capitalistic venture that anyone can get involved in. The problem is when you have guys like Clay Travis or Brooks from Sports by Brooks. These guys are actually making their living off blogging about college sports. When you are making your living off the site then you have to have site hits. It becomes not about sharing cool or interesting thoughts about sports, it's about writing something that will draw folks in.

A Bandit Ref For Vols AD Scrapbook

Bandit with his future plebs.

Bandit hobnobs with the Tennessee Governor. 

Bandit Ref For Vols AD Keeps A Promise To Legend

A couple of days ago on Finebaum show regular  Legend tweeted his support for me as Vols AD.  You know how much the Volunteers love Legend after all.  He had one condition though, I must bring back Phil Fulmer.

@Legendisland
The Legend


@banditref for Tennessee A.D. But only if you bring back the most hated man ever in the SEC! Fat Phil!LOL!

Bandit Ref Applies to be the Next Tennessee Athletic Director UPDATE!

I was fairly certain when I applied to be the next athletic director of the University of Tennessee that a response would be quick.  After all, it's not often that a candidate of my caliber not only applies, but also offers you a Dollywood coupon as a bribe.  Still, I was a bit caught off guard that a few short hours after submitting my extensive application a response from Parker Executive Search was in my mail box.  The response follows:

Mr. Ref:

Thank you for your interest in the Vice Chancellor and Director of Athletics search at the University of Tennessee.  We will present your information to the search committee for their review & consideration.

We will be in touch soon with an update.

All the best,

Amanda Barfield 

I Apply to be the Next University of Tennessee Athletic Director

BANDIT REF FOR TENNESSEE A.D. !!!

As we all know the University of Tennessee recently fired esteemed court jester and Athletic Director Mike Hamilton. It came to my attention that Tennessee was now conducting a search for his replacement. The search is being spearheaded by Parker Executive Search. Normally I wouldn't do this, but I feel bad for the Volunteers. They are in need of strong leadership, a steady hand on the wheel as it were. So I have reluctantly decided to throw my name into the ring. I am here by announcing my candidacy for the position of Tennessee Athletic Director. I am warning you Phillip Fulmer, I don't play fair. (of course neither did Phillip Fulmer) Just in case you are wondering this isn't a joke, I mean it totally is, but it's not. I really did send the following materials in to make my case.

Buy, Sell, or Hold SEC Football 2011

Alabama - BUY - The Tide are going to be tough to beat this year, they have an incredible defense coming back,  Trent Richardson is back at running back, and they have a solid line on both sides of the ball.  Right now, they look like the team to beat in the SEC.  Of course the success of the Tide is nothing new, Nick Saban has put together a monster of a football team and we wouldn't look for them to falter anytime soon.  Anything less than a BCS game or a national championship would be a failure for a team with this much talent and this kind of coaching.

Auburn - SELL - Auburn had an outstanding year last year, but that was last year.  Arrest, accusations, and players leaving for the pros have taken a toll on this team. The Auburn football team is a shell of what it was last year.  The weakest point on this team looks to be the lines on both sides of the ball.  It really doesn't matter that Auburn seems to be trying to bring in some new hired guns in the running back and quarterback positions.  Whoever is in the backfield on offense better have their chinstrap on tight, cause that line of freshman is going to have a hard time protecting them. On top of all this Auburn has a tough schedule this year, playing most of their major games away. With Alabama, MSU, LSU, and Arkansas all looking to be great this year Auburn could be looking at the quickest fall of any reigning BCS champion in history.